A funny thing happened to me yesterday and I remembered it specially to tell everyone in LJ land.

It was late at night and I popped the Ashton Kutcher interviewed by Vernon Kaye video in and reached down by the side of my bed for my friendly pink sparkly vibrating friend when my fingers touched something of a similar shape, but definitely not my vibrator.

I leaned out of the bed to look, and there lying innocuously next to said sex toy was a perfectly cock shaped parsnip. They lay there side by side. Parsnip vs buzzing dildo.

I'm sure it would have been a very poetic moment had I not been instantly embarrassed and enraged at Tristan, who of course, was the Parsnip procurer. That means his gaze rested upon a toy that has been more intimate to me than some one night stands.

Suggestions as to how I should deal with him tonight?!

Check out this fantastic video. Who is that HOT drummer?!!!!!

http://www.video-c.co.uk/showvids.asp?vidref=thev005

It's been about a year since my break up with Kris, my single living madness (ably assisted by sex strumpet Louise aka The Nekkid Chick), and random boy interactions.

I can't believe how much my life has changed.

Back then I was constantly in these bright yellow shoes that were the only bright thing in my day sometimes, always accompanied by incredibly short skirts and little tees. I'd invariably find myself standing at bus stops at 8am wondering how to get into work and buying knickers from M&S on the way in.

I met some great people, notably the Irish boys, and some insincere people, like Oli and some beautiful young boys like George (thanks for that one Dodger) and the just plain confusing like Olly. I felt a bit like my life had been shredded to pieces after all the hassles I had with various bands I had worked with. All that held me together was going out, the friendships I had with people like Sarah and Louise and Matty and this determination not to be dragged into depression.

Well, it worked. My life is pretty unrecognisable from then to now.

Those yellow shoes are hell of a beat up though.

Smokers Gain £60

Dear Mira
[100035:453072095]

I hope you don't mind me writing to you to ask your help - you joined Saros to receive invitations to research events you may be eligible for. You may be eligible for this one, but if not we are asking if you know anyone who is.

I am taking the liberty of mailing you to ask if you know of anyone you could recommend to us. If you do manage to find anyone new to Saros that we can book for this we will send you a 10 pound bonus as a thank you.

If you definitely *don’t* wish to receive requests to help us in this way in future do let us know. We will of course still send you invitations to participate in groups yourself.

The people we are looking for are:

* Aged 18-24, regular daily cigarette smokers of any of the following brands: Marlboro Regular (NOT Lights); B+H Regular, or B+H Lights.



We are trying to find a number of suitable people for research discussion sessions (day and evening) in Hammersmith, London W14 between 9 and 13 August. The groups will last between 1 and 3 hours, and all participants will be paid 60 pounds for their time and effort.

So if you know of anyone who might fit this criteria and would like to take part we need to hear from them as soon as possible - please ask them to email jobs@sarosresearch.com with their contact details. Alternatively, the EASIEST way to register for this project is to get them to fill in the web form: http://www.sarosresearch.com/jb/AB2.asp?id=453072095. If it’s a friend, relative or colleague of yours do make sure they let us know both your FULL NAME and your Saros ID number (which is 453072095), so that we can ensure you get your bonus!

(or if not formatted as a link, cut and paste the whole URL into your browser window, hotmail users may need to press ‘refresh’ before the link will work anyway) to register your interest and answer a few quick questions – then if they’re eligible to participate one of our interviewers will call them back to book them for a session

If it’s a friend or colleague of yours who is new to Saros, do make sure they let us know both your name and your Saros ID number (which is 453072095), so that we can ensure you get your bonus if they attend the group.

If you don't know of anyone then really don't worry, just hit delete now, there is no need to reply. We have so many new projects coming in at the moment I am sure it won't be long before we are writing to you again.



My thanks in anticipation,