I am skill!


Good. You know your music. You should be able to
work at Championship Vinyl with Rob, Dick and
Barry


Do You Know Your Music (Sorry MTV Generation I Doubt You Can Handle This One)
brought to you by Quizilla

(It was a very easy quiz though - no meaty questions, only antipasta. Limited to the 60's and 90's. I don' feel so big and clever now)

Last night I went to see the magnificent Curry Tales starring Rani Moorthy in a one woman show. I was expecting a sort of comedy crossed with Ready Steady Cook, but it turned out to be more than that.

Rani works her way through various characters all in kitchens, all cooking curries and all with different stories to tell. She is among her characters a voodoo queen, a socialite restaurant owner, a yuppie business woman and the Kitchen Goddess. Despite the fact that the Bear clung to me in horror in case she picked on him (it involved a lot of audience participation) I was drawn into all the stories and laughing one minute and nearly in tears the next. All this with tastes of delicious curries delivered into the audience as she completes her story and her cooking.



and a whinge. As well as us in the theatre, some parent had seen fit to host her kid's 13th(?!) birthday party there, so we had a bunch of giggling adolescents who shouted out sarcastic things that weren't funny and talked over the quiet parts and were EXTREMELY irritating. I can recognise this because my mother organised a trip to the Reading Hexagon to see My Fair Lady for one of my birthdays and we were so stupefied by the boring production that when we finally escaped to MacDonalds for food, it was as though my parents had released caffiened-up-sugar-rushing-monkeys back into the wild, the destruction was so great. WHY TAKE KIDS TO THE THEATRE WHEN THEY WONT APPRECIATE IT?! They all scrambled for the back row for chrissakes?!! This wasn't a maths lesson with a senile teacher it was a funny, heart rending play that was so so so so good, compared to so many other plays that you take in as part of being a Londoner. ArgH!

As if this wasn't boggling enough, someone turned up with a BABY!! To watch a play!?? We all knew it was only a matter of time before the little humanoid started making baby sounds, and to it's credit it didn't start wailing but I mean WHY would you bring a baby along?

Don't even get me started on the twat sat behind me who's mobile went off. I wish someone could invent a mobile damping field which would block mobile coverage in cinemas and theatres.

Finally, Happy Birthday Rhodri! 33 today and never yet been mistaken for the Son of God. Way to go!

So last night I hosted the first convening of The Knitwits at my humble abode in Shepherds Bush. Although the evening proceeded to an inauspicious start with drop outs and tube delays, once ensconced in the living room with Thai food, Malteasers, snacks and friends it was a wonderful evening.

One of the attendees, Rebecca, works as a tailor's apprentice, so was on hand for all queries and was very knowing. learned to cast on, I learned the art of basting and made a Harry Potter cushion, Kim and Sean sketched, Bianca continued to knit her ever growing, soft-as-clouds angora kimono and Rebecca, (in between advising), was stitching a velvet jacket together.

The drink of the night was pineapple-Pina Colada. After a few of these sexy creamy cock...tails! had slipped down my throat I was feeling the happy warm vibe, and the murmur of us all chattering and the creative oneness of the meeting made me feel loved up and happy. Everyone left smiling and looking forward to the next one. We think this shall take place not this week, but the week after.

Last night I dreamt I had a junkie boyfriend, and I had to go and score crack for him in Kings Cross. He had these big baleful eyes and I was like, "ooooo go on then, just one more hit" and then I'd be feeling all amorous and he'd be grinning from ear to ear completely ecstatic on his fix and he'd put his arms around me then just crash out. Then I had a band called "My Junkie Boyfriend" and we sang songs about it, and I had a Japanese bass player that we kept catching trying to leave us to go to Norwich Uni and we had to keep driving to the train station to stop him. Very bizarre.

Tonight's mission: Operation Knitwit at my house, knitters and 80 film fans invited.

Ongoing mission: Rocky Mountain - to find the most rockin' gig and attend in full rock regalia before the end of October. "Rock" does not mean metal. Suggestions?

Today I will mostly be hankering after these.....cowgirl rollerskates.

With thanks and curtseys at the feet of Princess um_coeur

Did I tell you fellows that I would be a model for the designer Noki at the V&A museum as part of London Fashion Week? No? Oh, how unexpectedly modest of me!

I sashayed and teetered in heels that were higher than I have ever worn, along with who bravely soldiered on, only to rush off to hospital straight after the show! How guilty did I feel telling her it was all in her head?!

It was a wonderful experience but one that provided me with a surreal backdrop to the proceedings at Lush the next day. The night before I dreamt an awesomely weird dream so I was having lapses of concentration and flashbacks whilst serving customers and slicing the soap.

Sunday was a day of cleansing. My chambre à coucher des rêves was completely tidied and scoured. Anyone who knows me will be astonished at the clean surfaces, the uncovered and indeed vacuumed carpet which lies unsullied by dirty underwear or random mess. We took a trip to Chav Central and picked up a Boss Superlite vacuum cleaner which is nothing short of a miracle machine. Lite?! So light that the fairies could come and take it away in the night even if they were baby fairies with wings the size of teardrops. The carpets now look lovely and BLUE and not a mid-Atlantic Oceanic Grey.



In scary synergy with our housekeeping efforts, the boy Tristan came home victorious from Farnham brandishing throws for the three-piece-suite and a book of knitting tips and patterns. The knitting book was written by a hippy whilst on an agricultural commune and boy does it show. The pictures look as if the Freeserve advertising bods took it as their Bible for those hippy ads. I look forward to learning to knit properly with it.

Knitting night - "The Knitwits" rolls around this Wednesday. You are all warmly invited.

You got a B!

Solid grade girl! It's not a perfect but maybe in the long run it's better that way. I have a feeling we will hit it off and have a great time together.

And eventually, if we work hard late into the night, we can turn your B grade into an A in no time!


Take the Richard Blakeley Girlfriend Application Quiz by richardblakeley


Damnit, what's a girl gotta DO to get an A?! I tell you this, I sure as hell ain't listening to no Talking Heads fool!